This Uno Chicago Grill is magnificent. When everyone else is going to Russell House Tavern or Beat Hotel or some other trendy/gluten-free/organic/bullshit Harvard Square restaurant on a Friday night, this Grill is never packed because who in their right mind would choose a disgusting chain when you have so many options in Harvard Square?

This guy. This guy right here. If there’s five of you and you don’t want to spend $200 for dinner and drinks, go to this miracle of branding conformity. The precision machinery of chain restaurants is both awe-inspiring and terrifying, because the food in an Uno in Florida ten years removed from the last time I ate at one is identical to the one here in Harvard Square. It’s like nostalgia with a side of colitis.

There’s a big table service on the top floor and a big downstairs bar with a few larger tables. The wifi sucks down there, and the servers are somewhat aloof and understaffed, but they’re also nice and down-to-earth. I like going there sometimes by myself to order three of those horrible frozen Raspberry Coladas so I can sit in shame while working on my laptop at 10 o’clock at night. It’s great.

Also, $10 survey coupons via the receipt. Don’t forget about that.

Uno Pizzeria & Grill
22 John F. Kennedy St, Cambridge, MA 02138
https://goo.gl/maps/4CXefeGoai12